I'm not trying to sound like an over-aggressive asshat, here. I'm not a gratuitous speeder, and I don't think I take undue risks. I always wear my seatbelt, and have been the bane of every child and teenager who has ever ridden with me by refusing to even shift out of neutral before they are wearing theirs. So it's not about trying to be Speed Racer. It's about getting yourself from Point A to Point B in the quickest, most efficient manner possible within the bounds of safety, and creating an environment where others can do the same. Here's what I'm thinking:
1. Don't stop to let people go. I know you think you’re being helpful, but you’re not. You're being a pain in the ass. Why? Two reasons: First, there are probably people BEHIND you, and when you stop to let that one car go you are more than likely inconveniencing a whole bunch of other people. That just makes no sense. Second, the person you’re letting go doesn’t necessarily know that’s what you’re doing. Most of the time when someone slows down to let me in, by the time it’s clear that that’s actually what they’re doing, it would have been quicker if they’d just passed by. The kindest thing you can do for other drivers is just get yourself out of the goddam way.
2. Everyone should strive to watch what's going on more than, say, ten feet in front of them. When someone’s stopped to make a left turn 50 or 100 feet up ahead, there should be more than enough time to pass around them on the left (assuming there’s enough space and it's safe to do so). There’s no excuse for coming to a sudden stop right behind the person as though they just materialized out of nowhere. It’s called paying attention, and not enough people do it.
3. Once you have started to make a turn, you need to follow through. So you slowed down, turned on the blinker (assuming you did so – but that’s another point), began turning the wheel and THEN realized that you don't actually want to go that way? TOUGH. You are now committed to the turn. The people coming up behind you don’t know that you made a mistake, and don’t expect you to lurch abruptly back into the line of traffic. Complete the turn, find somewhere to turn around safely, and go where you meant to go in the first place.
4. The goddam turn signals are there for a reason. USE THEM. Why do so many people guard their intended course changes like a state secret?
5. When the light turns green, it's time to GO. It’s easy to remember, because "go" and "green" both start with the letter G. It's not time to futz with the radio. It's not time to check yourself in the mirror. It's not time to send a text message. It's time to GO. And when the light’s red and everyone's waiting, be prepared for it to change. Most people act like it’s a goddam surprise. "OH MY GOD THE LIGHT IS A DIFFERENT COLOR!!!" It’s going to change -- that's what it does. Even when I’m four or five cars back, when that light changes I’m good to go.
6. Whatever is going on at the side of the road is almost certainly not relevant to you. Whether it's a fender bender or a guy in an IROC-Z pulled over by a cop or road construction or a sale at the unfinished furniture outlet, it's not necessary to slow down for a better look. Once it's clear that it is safe to proceed, then PROCEED. The vast majority of the time there’s nothing going on, there’s probably nothing most passers-by could do even if there was, and the cop isn’t going to suddenly drop what he’s doing to chase down someone for going 37 in a 35 zone. As long as there’s not a body lying in the street blocking the way (or some other rare and extreme situation), the best thing most of us can do is just move along and clear the area.
7. If you are not going to drive FAST, then get out of the FAST lane. Because that's where you go (wait for it) FAST. That’s why they named it the FAST lane. I'm not talking about being unsafe. But as long as conditions permit, traffic in the fast lane should be moving at the maximum posted limit. Hint: if there are people passing you on the left, you’re going too slow.
8. If you're searching for an address or otherwise just dawdling along looking at the foliage or whatever, then you should at least have the courtesy to pull over from time to time to let people who actually have to be places at specific times (like, for example, anyone with a job) to pass. People expect to drive at the speed limit (again, assuming normal conditions), not 10 mph under. And if your vehicle (i.e. a dump truck, tractor trailer, etc.) is too slow and unwieldy to do so, then it should not be on that road.
9. Finally, there is the cell phone issue. Personally, I don’t have any specific beef with people talking on them most of the time, unless it interferes with the safe maintenance of their forward momentum. I do believe that dialing the phone while driving is unwise -- and texting is insane -- but just talking? It seems to me that anyone who can't hold a conversation and operate a motor vehicle at the same time shouldn’t even be allowed to talk to live people sitting next to them in the car, much less on the phone. There are a lot of good reasons to improve the flow of traffic on our roads. Simple civility and a general reduction of daily stress come to mind. There's also the potential savings in fuel costs that could be realized by reducing or eliminating delays (of course, much greater savings could be realized by driving more fuel-efficient cars, car pooling, and using more public transportation -- but that's another topic entirely!). Government could help -- reducing the proliferation of unnecessary stop signs and traffic lights might be a good place to start (but again, that's a rant unto itself). But I really think a lot of progress could be made if people just made a little effort to drive not just defensively, but responsibly, safely, and efficiently as well.
