Yeah, I really don't want to get into a big back and forth about what is canon and what is not. Bottom line: It doesn't matter what anyone — Lucas himself, the company, anyone — says, nothing is guaranteed until and unless it appears onscreen. Too many times in the past this or that point of the SW universe was considered canon, only to have onscreen events change it. Partly that's because it was (and is) a work in progress. Things change. Partly it's because Lucas designed it that way, and that's fine. But I am merely warning you as a friend: Don't get too wrapped up in what is canon, and don't assume that some aspect of the story you love will necessarily remain canonical. I've been burned on that too many times.
If I created a fantasy universe, I would probably do much the same thing that Lucas has done, to wit: Reserve certain characters and events to me and me alone, and open up the rest to others. Some things I would designate as canon, and they would become part of the "main" storyline. Other things I would not, but that doesn't mean people could not still enjoy them. But then I have the advantage of living in a world where the concept of "canon" is well-established. That was not so in the 1970s and 1980s when Star wars was coming up. Hell, somewhere in a box I have a SW novel from (iirc) the very late '70s, officially licensed by Lucasfilm, etc., that blatantly contradicts much of what came later. It was "canon" once (although I don't think that term existed yet in its present form), later it was not.
The bigger and more complex a world becomes, the more writers who have their hands in the pot, the harder it becomes to maintain continuity. Marvel and DC have both run into this problem several times, and have addressed it with varying degrees of success. If the Star Wars franchise continues and grows, they may have to face it at some point. Or maybe not. Who knows? It doesn't mean you can't enjoy the stories for what they are.
As for the EU, I just don't enjoy most of what I've seen. I don't hate it, please don't misunderstand me. And some of it (i.e. the Bane books) has even been pretty good. But, for me anyway, none of it feels like Star Wars. It just feels like (in most cases) reasonably well-crafted, more or less generic science fiction.
(Note: I do hate the Timothy Zahn books, though. I think they fail in terms of character, storyline, and capturing the feel of the SW universe.)
Star Wars has become almost like a religion, and it's at that stage of development in which schisms and variant orthodoxies begin to emerge. To continue with the analogy, I suppose I'd be a strict fundamentalist, in that I really only recognize the sanctity of the "Old Testament," i.e. Episodes IV-VI. Episodes I-III are the "New Testament," and the EU is the Apocrypha.
Hmm. This all fits rather well. Maybe we should consider creating a Star wars religion...