I was thinking about crocs the other day, and one thing let to another. So I ended up firing this email off to their customer service.
Hello! I would like to complement you on your wonderful shoes. I deeply love my pair of crocs, and it has occurred to me that you may be missing out on an untapped market segment.
Crocs are insanely comfortable, AND fluid resistant. They also provide a firm grip, to ensure traction in slippery situations.
As it so happens, there is a situation that is perfectly suited to crocs, and crocs are NOT currently being used there. In certain professions, there is a high demand for footware such as crocs.
Imagine a commercial. You see the bare back of a man. The camera slowly pans out, as you see two people going at it hot and heavy. You hear "CUT" shouted in the background. The male performer turns to the camera and flashes a perfect smile. He says "Hi! I'm Dick Cummons, star of such films as Getting It Up There, and Back Alley Hotdogs 3. But in my job, there's often dangerous working conditions."
*camera continues to slowly pan out*
"Working in my job can result in slippery floors and sticky situations. But that's why I wear crocs."
*camera has pulled back far enough to show that everyone on the set is wearing crocs*
"Wearing crocs has made my job considerably safer. Not to mention even more comfortable and awesome."
He smiles again, and turns back to his partner for the next shot. As the image slowly blurs into the background, you hear in the background "get ready for the next shot! Where's Dick's fluffer?"
The crocs logo appears on screen over the now blurred image, and a sultry British female voiceover announces: "Crocs. For the pornstar inside you."